That place where the Gonpa is

 

I will start from the very beginning of the story. Year 2001

That place where the Gonpa is, that is to say a part of that structure that is the Gonpa, was a shed. The place where the tools and the tractor of the farm were kept. And in the back, behind Rinpoche's throne, there is a very strong concrete wall that served as a structural base for that shed.

 There were a lot of sheep and goats that would be sticking their heads out of the top bleating, in the middle of a practice with Rinpoche. It was very comical. (smiles)

This was after the twin towers at the end of 2001, that we came with Rinpoche who sat there looking at the wall and said, "here we are going to paint, I want that wall white and I am going to paint the three phrases, the three statements of Garab Dorje". Direct introduction, not to remain in doubt and to continue in the state.

So, we painted the wall white, and I remember when we started painting, some of us who were there, which were very few of us, but in particular Fabio - laugh - I don't remember but there was another person, who were staring, and Rinpoche looked at everybody and said, "look, we are not tourists here, OK?"

Everybody went to get what a brush, what a broom to sweep. When the wall was painted white, he, with a red paint that he had asked for, because that red color had been specifically chosen, but a particular red.

He grabbed a paintbrush and filled it with paint, however, when he finished passing it, the brush only had paint at the ends, leaving the center without paint, as it had already worn out. Then, he put the brush back in the paint and continued writing. And it occurred to me that I had to fill it in since he had not been able to fill in between the two red lines that appeared at the end. And I went over to fill it in.

Oops. Rinpoche's reaction was very quick, and he told me: "don't touch" ... "it stays like this".

I noticed by watching him very well, that he wrote and did not go back to retouch anything, it was all with a single movement.

Well, the three famous phrases of Garab Dorje are there, the ones that define the three: Sende, Longde and Upadesha, the three aspects of Dzogchen, or the three teachings of Dzogchen.

And at a certain point in the construction of the Gonpa, which was little by little, it was not a one-time idea, we were around that old structure of the shed. This was buried, let's say, behind a new concrete wall, which covers all this and gives it an appearance of continuity, but underneath are those phrases, behind the back of the master when he is sitting on the throne.

 Without going into too much detail, as to where the Mandala is now ...

The mandala was another story, but before the floor in that place was about three quarters of a meter lower, down there we painted a mandala on the concrete, and when we changed the structure for the final structure of the Gonpa, as we see it at the moment, that area was filled with stone and concrete. That is, underneath the current mandala is another mandala.

The actual mandala is made ... that is to say, it is not paint, it is white cement mixed with resins that were resinous in the market, that is to say, they did not know how to work very well, and in particular, the red one was a lot of work, that is to say, it gave us a lot of headaches. At a certain point Rinpoche said, "Well, that red is close enough to what I want. It's not something that's going to wear off like an acrylic paint, that you put on cement and it's going to wear off little by little. It's a dense enough layer, not too much but just enough of white cement with those organic colors. I think it's the only one like that, in the world.

 Then we built the Gonpa, where the roof structure is very particular, we had to invent. We were helped by a group of three local brothers, very nice and helpful, of course they were paid for their work, but they were working there with us. The roof was made with two slopes, to the west and to the east. We made some trusses that are structures composed of two beams connected by rules in equis, anchored with thick bolts. sometimes we had to glue them, based on what those people told us, for that there are products in the market, of two components that result in a strong glue that works well with the wood. The trusses, in general, are very well made. However, when we finished putting up the trusses, and started to cover, the weight of the roof started to open up near where the master sits. I noticed it, I don't think anyone else noticed it, but I went to Rinpoche. I said to him:

"Rinpoche, I think we have a problem. Maybe we have to lower the whole roof, because so and so happens..."

Rinpoche came with me down to the Gonpa, looked at the thing. He was like meditating there, and he told me: "Don't worry, go on. No problem."

I say that again, the master was teaching me something: where a decision did not depend on the usual, let's say, logic, let's say in particular mine, very scientific. But because I have a trust in him, let's say absolute trust, I was unconcerned. Because the first night, after having discovered this, I really did not sleep well, I was very worried.

Then, those trusses were covered, with thick veneer, the thickest, so that we had those surfaces completely smooth, without showing the underlying structure, so that it could be painted. That was Rinpoche's wish. For that purpose, he invited Dinma, who is a Tibetan living in Merigar, who has painted the Merigar Gonpa, the tankha of the twelve masters. He brought in his suitcase a lot of stencils with the motifs that are normally painted in those cases, that is, the motifs that you are seeing. Those flowers, those leaves, the animals, I think he had them all in stencils. And he began to draw.

First, we had to organize a scaffolding system, we rented scaffolding everywhere. I don't know how many scaffolding units we had there, maybe there were about twenty, but it was very easy to work there because we had them connected with stairs and corridors.

Dinma with the help of two people, who I think had come with him from Merigar, I don't remember their names, but they were Europeans, did the initial drawings. Then every day something was painted, and because there was so much scaffolding, a certain population was allowed up there. There could be a dozen people at a time. And everybody could participate. I had two hours off, so I would go and paint with the others.

So, today it is white, he would mark the places and you would walk around painting those places in white, respecting the borders. It was a very nice job, with a lot of people, a lot of participation. We were very happy to see the birth of Dinma's floral landscape. It was really a very interesting adventure.

When was this done, I'm not quite sure, but I would say it was around 2010?

(I think in terms of Gonpa, that's it).

 

The circular window of the dining room of Rinpoche's house.

 

The circular window of the dining room of Rinpoche's house.

Throughout the years 2003, 4, 5, and 6, the retreats in Tashigar were numerous. We had two years, if I remember well, when there was a monthly retreat. Some years Rinpoche spent in Tashigar Norte eight, nine, ten, I think once, up to eleven months almost the whole year. That is to say that we lived there, a certain number of practitioners lived in the camping, in the houses, which translated into an affluence in Rinpoche's house. When I say affluence, I mean that there were always people who were strangers to Rinpoche's family. In the kitchen it was to help Rosa, on our teacher's side, it was to help him sometimes to rearrange some things in his office, in his studio. Other times it was to repair or reinstall the internet bam, it was a Movistar bam and we had many problems with those things at that time. We had to invent new solutions all the time. In general, the Red Gakyil, the biku, some of us were there, Raul Baratini, sometimes Rolando and many times me. That day we had been doing something and as many times, we were invited to share the table with Rinpoche at noon. It was a little party for us, although it was always a very quiet party. That day we had lunch with Rinpoche, sometimes we would talk about topics that were not usually discussed at other times like politics. And that day when everyone is leaving, Rinpoche gives me to understand that I could stay with him, to perform a task at the dining room window.

The window of that dining room is a large hole, more than a meter in diameter, which is covered with a very thick, round glass, supported with four stainless steel hooks, forming a kind of rhombus, or cross if you want to see it differently. Then, our teacher quickly gives me to understand that the task is to pass some strings of five colors, the five colors of the elements. Blue, green, white, red, yellow, and you have to pass them around the perimeter and from time to time, the string goes horizontally or vertically to form a cross.

The size of the window means that one person, Rinpoche alone, cannot cover all four hooks at once, and my task, I quickly realized, was to facilitate his movements so that he could do it more continuously.

We didn't talk anymore, after the first explanation of what we were going to do. It was silence, it was a kind of meditation that lasted two, three hours, I don't remember, but it was very long. Very simple, very deeply pleasant. It was really for me a moving meditation. At a certain moment I dared to break Rinpoche's silence.

So, you are doing this so that the little birds are able to detect that there is an object in their way and they are not going to kill themselves against the glass, right? But my question contained: but is there something else?

Then, Rinpoche looked at me with his mischievous childish smile: "yes".

But that "yes", he meant no, that is; "that too". Obviously in the threads there was something else. He did not give me another explanation; I did not dare to ask him for it and I was left with the idea that there was obviously an energetic aspect that for some reason I was not able to grasp.

Perhaps seen from the outside, that little event with the master may seem unimportant. In my memory it remained as a wonderful day, that somehow gave me a lot, I don't know what, but it remained as a very, very fundamental thing, one of the most important things of my experience with Rinpoche.

Truly today, I always treat him as if he were here watching me, I believe he is watching me. I thank him for that day in a very, very particular way.

I'd say about two dozen square tables perfect for playing "Patchen

 

Patchen.

During all those early years there were rites. One of them was Sunday afternoon, which lasted for years.

On Sunday afternoons at half past three, Rinpoche would walk down from his house to the dining hall. The dining room had been the old chicken coop, where the egg production was, with a structure to house a few hundred hens. We had transformed it into a dining room, with a kitchen in the back and about twenty ... I'd say about two dozen square tables perfect for playing "Patchen".

Across the street from that dining room still in existence, is the master's bathroom. And for us the practitioners, the residents, it was the bathroom next to the Gonpa.

Then on Sundays, Rinpoche would come down, he would enter with a ceremonial attitude his torso facing us... How beautiful was our Rinpoche! ... he would enter and sit at a table in the lower part, usually facing the center.

In general people would try to go and play Patchen with the master. This was played on fours and anyone who wanted to would sit down. Not everyone was interested in Patchen, but those of us who were interested occasionally liked to sit at the table with the master, then there might be a little dispute to participate.

Well, I'll get down to business ...

That day Antonio, another person and me, we had had a slightly more abundant meal, we had had a few beers and we arrived a little late. When I say late, I mean that the teacher had already entered the dining room, and when I arrived, there was still some space at Rinpoche's table, something very rare. I asked permission and was able to sit in front of Rinpoche at the table where we were going to play Patchen. By then, those beers I had drunk were already in my bladder and I needed to go pee in the bathroom. At that time, I had prostate problems and it wasn't good for me to be holding it in for too long. So, at the end of a game I said: "Excuse me, I'm going to the bathroom" and I got up and went to the bathroom.

Yeah. When I was peeing quietly, there was something, I wasn't feeling entirely pleased with myself.

I went back to the table, and there, when I sat down in front of Rinpoche, Rinpoche turned his head not to look at me and said in Italian: "I don't want to play with him" ... imagine, I don't want to play with him, he wasn't even saying it to me, he was saying it to the others. Then I understood everything. I was absent and it was obvious. Rinpoche would play from three o'clock, sometimes until ten o'clock, many times at six, or seven or eight. And Rinpoche would also get up to go to pee, but when Rinpoche did that, he would call to someone passing by: "Look X, sit down in my place and play this turn of the game for me, try not to lose. And he would go to pee quietly.

I, being so important, had gone to pee, leaving the teacher waiting to continue the game.

Of course, when I realized all this, I felt some embarrassment, but... Rinpoche was telling me that he didn't want to play with me and I defended myself for a few seconds, then Rinpoche, raised his head, and to Grisha who was passing by he said: "Grisha, sit in Michel's place". Of course, I had to get up. I was very embarrassed, and to tell you the truth, I was with that unhappiness, inside, for a few weeks....

Well, on Sundays I went anyway, to the dining room, to be with the others, to see Rinpoche, and each time, with some embarrassment. But, little by little I managed to understand deeply, what it represented of the ego, that small mistake. Not so small in the measure of being the master, but I was able to observe my ego in a more evident way.

Little by little the wound healed and I came on Sundays a little more normal, a little happier to be there, although I did not dare to come to Rinpoche's table.

One Sunday that I arrived a little bit late again, about three months later or maybe more, I entered the dining room and Rinpoche was already seated at a table with two other people, I think Gilberto was there and when Rinpoche saw me, he called me: "Michel, do you want to play with us?", this time he did not tell me in Italian, which he knew was not my favorite language... (laughs). He told me in English – “please sit down- It was the happiest day of my life!

the teacher had forgiven me, if he had forgiven me, this meant that he justified, I don't know from what point, that I had done the necessary work to observe what had happened to me. And my unhappiness was transformed into a transcendental happiness...